Searching for Peace of Mind : A Personal Journey

Hi! Seems like your pursuit is similar to mine. Because, you too are searching for peace of mind .

In my case, it started with a dream.

The dream of living a beautiful life. The only problem was that I didn’t know what constituted a beautiful life. I was never prepared for it. I am still not prepared for it.

I was never searching for peace. I wanted recognition and fame. I got them. And as it always happens, it was short lived.

At one point of time, I used to believe that I was a superior human being. Now, I think that I am below average. See, what happens when you lose it. You start doubting everything.

It wasn’t like this earlier. I used to think myself invincible and immortal. I used to think that I am special. And was overwhelmed with the opportunities life offered. I wanted all of it.

I ended up having none.

My search for peace of mind & the imbalance between wants and needs.

More than a decade ago, I wanted a good job. I got one.

At that point of time; a job was my want as well as my need.

Now the job is my need but it’s not what I want.

So what’s my need now?

It’s peace of mind.

Human mind is clever in associating things. In my case it has associated peace with absence of job. In other words, the presence of job is synonymous to absence of peace.

You can’t have peace if you don’t have money

I don’t want to be a millionaire. I just want good enough to provide for my family. You see, I am not a businessman. I am just an ordinary guy who blogs.

I work in shifts in a steel plant. My daughter hates it when I have to go for night shifts. I hate it too, but that’s what provides for my family.

Now, it seems that I have got used to this hatred. I know that I hate it & I can’t do anything about it. So, I have started ignoring the hatred.

At a subconscious level I feel that it’s my job that is keep my away from my dream life.

Right now, for me  – a dream life is a jobless life.

However, in this jobless life, I should be getting enough money to provide for my family. See, it looks like a dream already.

I know what I have to do, but I can’t

It’s no point working for a job that makes your life miserable. Nevertheless, I have chosen to stay in my current job. Why? Because I know that I don’t have any other means to provide for my family.

I have a blog, but that makes one-tenth of what my current employer is paying me. I can manage it, even if it makes one-fourth. But, at one-tenth it’s just unthinkable.

Quitting my job is not only the greatest desire of my life right now. It’s my greatest want and greatest need. But, I don’t know how to go about it.

I am not scared of life but I don’t wan to take an illogical step

I would have quit my job long ago, if I didn’t have a family. But with a family right now, I don’t want my family suffer for my impulsiveness.

I know that I can’t have peace if my family remains in turmoil. After all it’s hard to remain calm in an empty stomach.

But haven’t we read it that peace if often preceded by turmoil.

If you are used to the comfort zone, then it’s hard to find peace. The problem with most of us is that we have got used to the comfort zone. And we are scared of getting out of this zone.

We know how to bear the pain in this zone. But we don’t know anything about the stuff that shows up once you get out of it.

There could be limitless possibilities if you step out of your comfort zone, but you choose to bear the pain of your comfort zone. Why? Because you are scared of the uncertainties.

But, didn’t I say in the beginning that I am not scared?

Well! I lied. Everyone lies. I am no different. I’ve mentioned it earlier – I am just an ordinary guy who blogs.

What if your comfort zone is making it impossible for you to think right

You can’t quit your current job if you don’t have another source of income lined up – That’s the conventional wisdom if have read, heard and believed. Until now.

Over the years, I have tried several online ventures.

  • Boojh.com
  • GetRichPoint.com
  • HowToBecomeRich.in
  • GarudHosting.com
  • TechRadia.com
  • ChaserBeing.com
  • SplendidPursuits.com
  • ViralPuff.com
  • LifePorting.com
  • Prepsit.com
  • ElectronicsPost.com
  • Virtunis.com
  • QforQuestions.com
  • JhasketanGarud.com

But I couldn’t work on any of these long enough. I wanted to see quick results. I wanted the sites to replace my salary as soon as possible. But that did not happen.

For example, GetRichPoint.com was the first site that made money. I monetized it with Adsense. But the income was too less. I lost patience and moved on another venture.

The next venture was HowToBecomeRich.in. It made money as well. But the income was less. So, I lost patience again and moved on to another venture.

The next venture was GarudHosting.com. And the vicious cycle repeated.

My ventures made money, but I couldn’t work on them long enough.

I read a lot of books and sites and found that the problem lied in me. I needed to change my nature. I needed to be more patient. I needed to believe in my projects.

But you know what? I learned a very important lesson.

It’s not always your mistake.

I couldn’t hold on to my projects long enough. I admit that’s my mistake.

But why it happened? Why wasn’t I able to work on them long enough? Why I became impatient on gave up on them? Why was I in such a hurry to jump over to start a new venture that promised to replace my salary? Why every other idea seemed golden?

You can’t have patience when you’re made to sit on a heater.

A man in distress wants to believe in each and every opportunity he is presented. He wants to end the pain no matter what it costs. He thinks that what he is doing is right, even if it’s a pure blunder. He tries on thing and he fails. He tries and he fails again. Then he tries again and he fails again. But he never loses hope. He still believes that he can make it. He still hopes that his dreams will come true.

Such a man is not a lunatic. He is magnificent. The only problem is that he is working hard in the wrong environment.

Change the environment and he will slide the tectonic plates, under your feet.

Man is an intelligent animal. All his strength lies in his intelligence. Take away his intelligence and he can’t decide what’s good for himself.

A highly stressful environment takes away man’s ability to think properly. It steals his patience. It makes him scared. And the longer he remains in this cage, the closer he comes to becoming an animal.

Breaking out of a toxic environment needs extraordinary effort. It needs perseverance and dedication. It needs extreme discipline. It’s a combination of a lot of things which only a stable and calm mind can achieve. And you can’t have a calm mind in an extremely toxic environment.

Achieving success in any venture needs tremendous focus. And, to focus you need clear vision. And for getting this clear vision, you need to quarantine yourself from this toxic environment.

It’s not logical. It’s irrational pessimism.

Am I going to die, if I quit my job?

No.

Is my family going to starve, if I quit my job?

No way.

Will I able to get a new job, if nothing works out?

Yes. Of course.

Then what is stopping me from quitting this job?

I don’t have enough money for fall back upon.

How much money do you need?

I need at least a year’s worth of cushion money.

No. You don’t need that much money. You’re not going for a one year vacation. Six months should be enough for your new venture to bear fruits.

So what should I do now?

You should save just enough to survive without a job for the next six months & then quit it.

Fear not about what will happen to you. Fear about what you’re doing to yourself.

The scariest thoughts are inside your mind. You’re sabotaging your growth by exaggerating the consequences of getting out of the comfort zone.

Do you know what’s the worst that can happen?

It’s getting trapped in the toxic environment forever.

And that’s what will happen if you do not step out of your, so called, comfort zone.

I have dedicated the last 10 years of my life in pursuit of pain. Now, it’s my time to dedicate at least 6 months to pursue peace of mind.

Maybe you realize that all your fears were unfounded

What if you take a leap of faith and discover the things to be entirely different from what you had anticipated.

What if you realize that not taking this leap earlier was the biggest mistake you ever made.

Maybe the road to peace will not be easy, but there will still be joy in the pursuit.

This is one of the greatest lessons I have learnt in Life

I worked so hard and I worked so long, yet I didn’t see the kind of success I always expected. Why?

I found the answer when I analyzed my life in retrospect. What I found would be helpful to you as well. Hence, I wouldn’t take much of your time and will come to the point right away.

Stick to just one thing if you want to see grand success in your life

Start a blog and stick to it. Don’t jump around starting new ones now and then. Or, else you will end up regretting why didn’t you just stick to the first one.

Well, that’s a personal experience.

In the last several years, I’ve started and dropped several websites. Had I stuck to just any one of them, till now, the story of my life would have been immensely different.

People say that there is no point in regretting. However, I think there is advantage in regretting if you learn from your regret.

I hate self pity and this article is certainly not about it. This article is about learning from past mistakes.

No one was born mature and I am no different.

My mistake was that I dabbled in many things. Almost all of them bore fruit, but I was not satisfied with the quantity of fruits they bore and I did not have the patience of waiting for them to grow more.

In fact, I used to think that if they can’t bear more fruits in short time, then they can’t bear fruits in the long time . This thinking was flawed.

The grass on the other side always looks greener but don’t fall for that trap

In my first blog was a tutorial website. It taught people about technology and coding. However, I thought that it would be better if I just started a personal finance blog.

So, I started a personal finance blog. It was doing good, until I became greedy and started another personal finance blog with an EMD (Exact Match Domain). The effect of EMD was seen soon and I started getting lots of traffic all of a sudden. I deleted my first personal finance blog, which was actually doing quite good.

Everything was fine, till a major Google update struck the EMD sites. I was one of them.

Now instead of trying to recover from Google impact I just deleted the website.

Then I started a viral website whose biggest source of traffic was Facebook. This one was the most successful website, I ever created. However, as Facebook reduced organic reach, I suffered a drop in traffic.

Now, I committed one more blunder. I sold my website.

After this event I created and deleted many websites. But one thing happened that surprised me.

One website, a tutorial blog, became more successful than my viral website (the one I sold). I never expected this website to do so good. I was surprised at its success.

I pondered why this one became so successful. Then I found the answer.

The stuck to this site longer than any of my websites.

See, I never expected this website to do good. Yet this was my most successful website.

And, the only reason this happened was because I did not give up on this one.

I lost myself a long time ago.

Do you ever feel that you lost yourself a long time ago. And you don’t even remember the why, when and how of it. Or, maybe, if you rewind your thoughts you’ll be able to reach that particular point in life when you put your first step in the wrong track, never knowing how far this will take you from yourself.

I lost myself a long time ago. I don’t find peace with myself anymore. I am a blogger and I am supposed to be the expert here, who has all the answers. But, I will be true to you. I am lost and I have no idea how to get back to myself.

I always used to think that finding success was all I ever needed to find in life. However, now I do realize that success is fleeting and it never is a destination in itself. And the desire for success is insatiable. No sooner than you achieve a milestone, you desire to hit the next one.

I have been running in circles. I work hard but I don’t reach anywhere. And the pathetic part is that, all the while running in circles, I believed that I will reach my destination.

But now I realize that I have been chasing the wrong dreams all these years. And wrong dreams never lead you to right destinations.

 So, what do I want now?

I want peace.

An all encompassing peace. I want peace in the work I do. I want peace in way I live and I want peace in the efforts I make to maintain the peace, once I find it.

I am not after millions of dollars. I just want peace. Should it be very difficult to find?

I don’t know. I just don’t want to run in circles anymore. I want to break out of this track. I want to enter into the unexplored path that leads to an unknown jungle.

Maybe I will find peace there. And maybe, I’ll be able to find myself then.

You don’t need the stock market to become rich. Do this instead.

Most of us are so much obsessed with making money, that we don’t even give a second thought before risking out hard earned money.

Risking money to make huge money is perhaps the most popular method of trying to become rich. Other popular methods are lottery tickets, network marketing etc.

But do you know what? Trying these methods will make you more miserable than you actually are.

You don’t need the stock market to become rich

In fact, I would suggest you to stay away from it. There are more reasons for you to lose money in the stock market, than there are stars in the universe.

I don’t say that no one can make good money from the market, because I actually know people who are making a living from the stock market and some of them are even filthy rich.

However, the chances of the common man becoming a millionaire from the stock market are extremely slim.

I don’t want to discourage you.

I actually want to save you from spoiling your life.

In fact, life will be far better off if you stay away from the stock market. Because, there are other ways to make money that are safer and more satisfying from the stock market route.

Nevertheless, if you insist upon the stock market route then be prepared for the following things:

  • Building huge debts
  • Strained relationships
  • Frustrated days and nights
  • Becoming broke
  • Hating yourself
  • Feeling like a loser
  • Feeling as if you are following a mirage

So what should you do if you want to become rich

The first thing that you should do if try not be become poor.

What does that mean?

A poor man does not have money. So try, never to be in a situation when you do not have money.

In other words, always keep some money aside. As long as you have kept some money aside you’ll never be poor.

The second step is to ensure that you never get under debt.

We usually come under debt when we are not prepared for certain circumstances:

  • Medical emergency
  • Marriage or some other occasion
  • Fees, etc.

Always keep some money aside for meeting financial emergencies.

One other reason why we come under debt is our lifestyle. We buy things which we are not able to afford. With the advent of EMI, most of us find it easier to buy expensive phones, cars, bikes etc.

But on the long run, these add up and build huge debt.

In short, don’t buy things that you do not need. Understand one thing very clearly – you needs and your wants are totally different things.  Don’t confuse your needs with your wants.

You need a phone. But you want an iPhone. But, actually, you don’t need an iPhone. You just need a phone.

See, what’s the difference between needs and wants.

Once you have mastered over your wants and needs, you need to focus on the third step.

The third step is to build upon your savings. Add some money to your savings each and every day.

A moneyless man is of no use to anyone.

If you have money with you, then you’ll be able to help not only yourself, but also your family members, friends and society at large.

But for that you need to have money in your account. And, the best way to make money is to save money.

You might think that saving money is never going to make you rich. But you know what? If you don’t know how to take save money, you’re never going to get rich.

The art of saving money is critical to becoming rich. This is a habit that you’ll have to develop and master if you are serious about becoming financially independent.

Don’t even think about investing money yet. Your aim is to just save money. Don’t fall for the trap of making money from money. It will ruin you.

Once, you have mastered the art of saving money and made it an addiction, you’re ready for the fourth step,which is actually the final step.

The fourth step is to generate other income streams that would trickle money into your bank account.

You can start an income stream by using any of the following methods:

  • Start a blog
  • Start a YouTube Channel
  • Take tutitions
  • Become a freelancer
  • Grow organic food in your backyard and sell them
  • Provide services, etc.

The fact is that you’ll need multiple streams of income to become financially independent. Don’t expect any one source to make you a millionaire. And most importantly, don’t expect a miracle to make you rich.

Making money in the stock market is one such miracle in which people have always believed and will continue to believe. Do you know why? Because, once in a while the stock market gives good money to each and everyone who participates in it. But, in the long run, it sucks each and every drop of blood from its victims.

Don’t fall for its enchanting trap.

Where exactly did I go wrong?

I don’t even remember how many times it has happened. I open up my WordPress dashboard to write an article but I don’t have any idea, what I want to write about. It’s just that I want to write something. Today is one such day.

Generally, it happens that write the headline (Title) of my article first and then continue with the body of the article. But, today, I begin with the body first and as I progress, I would come up with the title.

But why am I doing this?

Why do I have to write something, when I don’t even know what I want to write? Maybe, because I think that would make me feel good. Or, maybe, because I think that doing this regularly (writing regularly) would make my life better.

Or, maybe I think my life would have been better, had I continued writing on my blog regularly when I first started it.

It’s a more of a decision made by feelings than by my mind. I am writing this one, because I feel that I should write.

Maybe, no one will ever read this article. No problem with that. I have to write & that’s why I am writing.

A fact about life

I have found that nothing worthy comes in life without striving for it. It’s never going to happen that you wake up, one fine morning, and see all your dreams come true.

In fact it will take several days of hard work even before you realize one percent of your dream coming true. You will have to stick to it long enough to doubt the entire effort before you even see an inkling of hope.

I have quit many a projects in my life, because I believed in the opposite. I used to think that you can get success in just a few months. And that thinking has been the cause of all my troubles.

Had, I known earlier that my life would have been entirely different right now.

So, where did I go wrong?

Belief.

I stopped believing in my projects when things took a bit longer than what I anticipated. I did not know then, that even the best projects in this world took years before becoming fruitful.

I discontinued them, believing that I was wrong in taking them up in the first place. I was so very wrong.

I regret my decisions now.

I realize that I should have stuck to my projects even during the toughest times. But I did not have that kind of wisdom back then.

Now I understand that things take time. No matter what you’re trying to achieve in life, you’ll have to give time to it. And not only that, you’ll have to work on it ceaselessly as well. Nothing worthy comes out without persistence.

How To Become The Best Blogger in India

The target of becoming the best blogger is a bit subjective, because people have different criteria for judging that position:

  • How much traffic is coming to your site
  • How much money is your site making
  • How influential is your blog

The above is not an exhaustive list, however most blogs are judged on the basis of the above three criteria.

The road to becoming the best blogger in India

I have written this post keeping the Indian audience in mind. Hence, I’ll be saying a few things that you wouldn’t find elsewhere. That’s because most sites out there tell you how to become the best blogger in the world. I don’t say that their way is wrong. They are not at all wrong, however, their solution is a generalized one. And I am providing you with a solution that is tailor made for you. Continue reading “How To Become The Best Blogger in India”